the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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