It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
