My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
