But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
