Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
