dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just gift wrapped bread.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
