where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
