i don't like sucking hair
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
