Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize