But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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