Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
