HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
