I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
