Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize