im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
you never un-have a 4some
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
