People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
