I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
