Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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