fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize