im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I have post one night stand depression
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
