Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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