C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
