I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I will be naked everywhere
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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