My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Non-Jews are for practice
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
