Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
