I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
