Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
