So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
