I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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