I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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