he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
organizing the empties. That sober.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
