I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
