so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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