As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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