Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
