after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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