i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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