google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
