it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
