you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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