we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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