SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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