what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
