Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize