he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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