im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
