Your face is a jimmy john
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
