He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
