His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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