Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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