i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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