Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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